Many people will tell you that a narcissist will never stop harassing you and this could be your experience too.
It was mine until I discovered three powerful ways to get ANY narcissist to leave me alone.
In this Thriver TV episode I am going to share with you exactly what to do to get a narcissist completely and permanently out of your life.
And if you are co-parenting or this person is a family member I will share how to get them to detach and stay away from you.
Today is a very cool day. Because we’re going to talk about three incredibly powerful ways that you can get any narcissist to leave you alone.
Maybe you are not at this stage of wanting a narcissist to leave you alone, but if you are, this episode is totally for you. And even if you aren’t, I hope that by the end of the episode you will be ready to activate these three wonderful tips that I’m sharing with you today.
Okay, so before we get started, I’d like to thank all of you who are so wonderfully supporting the Thriver mission by subscribing to my channel and remind those of you who haven’t to please do. And, if you like this episode make sure you give it a thumbs up.
Okay, so on with this episode!
Why Do We Need Narcissists To Leave Us Alone?
The reason we need narcissists to leave us alone is because there is nothing to gain from trying to engage with a narcissist.
You can’t talk sanity into insanity. The more you try to reason with a narcissist, make a deal with them, try to plead with them, or lecture and prescribed to them, in other words grant them any of your energy whatsoever, it just makes matters worse. The only way to regain your sanity, soul, and life and win against a narcissist is to withdraw all of your energy, and focus on your own healing.
That’s when you will get free from this horrible experience and evolve and elevate yourself into your True and New life.
But, what if a narcissist won’t leave you alone? What if he or she seems hellbent on pestering you, continuing to abuse you and just won’t stop doing it?
So many people think and report that a narcissist will never stop doing what they’re doing to them, but I promise you this is not true. There are surefire ways that you can get a narcissist to leave you alone, regardless of ties that you think may bind you for life to him or her, such as sharing children together.
So, let’s check out how to do this.
Number #1 – No Contact
No Contact is not just essential to get a narcissist to leave you alone, No Contact is also vital to grant yourself the space to start healing from a narcissist.
No Contact is easier said than done. We all know how difficult it is to stay away from and repel the narcissist’s hoovering attempts and stop the ways that he or she can trigger you into breaking no contact, and all the other sneaky tactics that narcissists use to get your attention and ego feed from you.
This is where number three and number one are deeply interconnected, and I’m going to be explaining more about number three when we get to it. Suffice it to say that when you master how to emotionally manage yourself successfully enough to keep No Contact with a narcissist, then he or she runs out of the fuel to keep abusing you with.
Narcissists need a payoff for their efforts and the prize is always narcissistic supply. If a narcissist knows that he or she affects you, then the narcissist believes that he or she is significant, and that is the exact fuel that keeps the narcissistic cruel, malicious, attention-seeking, punishment cycles continuing.
Please know this: there is no greater insult to a narcissist than when they are no longer gaining any attention, energy or reaction from you.
It’s so important to understand that an energy exchange with a narcissist does not need to be physical and literal. Even if you are checking up on the narcissist, without him or her knowing, there is a psychic phenomenon occurring whereby the narcissist is still receiving your emotional energy through the ethers.
If you still feel emotionally hooked in, affected and traumatised by the narcissist – which is evident if you are still obsessing about him or her, then the narcissist is still getting energetic narcissistic supply from you. This grants the narcissist the fuel that allows him or her to continue violating you.
Again, this is exactly why number three, which we are going to talk about soon, is so vital.
Number #2 – Anti Fear
I love anti fear. It’s beyond powerful.
This is the next step up from true No Contact, and number two also requires the self-dedication to step number three.
Anti fear means that you have purposefully eradicated every part of yourself that has been buying into the illusion that the narcissist has power over you and is, on their own, capable of annihilating you, making your life a living hell, or destroying everything that you thought your life could be.
When we go Quantum, and wake up out of the trance, we realise the truth – that the narcissist is a deep soul experience causing us to meet outside of ourselves the fears and insecurities that were all along buried in our subconscious interior.
A startling thing happens when we stop trying to manage the fear by battling the narcissist (which of course breaks rule number one – No Contact, literally, emotionally and energetically) and instead turn inwards to manage (which really means eradicate) the fear that we are feeling inside of ourselves.
This creates a massive shift in consciousness. Without our internal trauma, we see things clearly as they are, as the truth of the matter. We become wise; we know that the narcissist is in fact an insecure, powerless individual inciting and using our own fear against us.
We sense a deeper power and presence that rises up within us that applies to all of Life itself.
This is … that there is a benevolent, solid, all-loving force that is positioned to unfold what is right, true and wholesome when we understand how all of life works. If we are being self-partnered then all of Life follows.
By releasing ourselves from our inner traumas and fears, we know how to show up, we stop dimming down, playing safe and handing our power away trying to appease narcissists so that they stop hurting us.
Rather, we rise up and stay true to our values and our boundaries regardless of what somebody else is or isn’t doing. We are no longer scared of other people. We are willing to lose it all to get it all. We understand that living outside of our own personal integrity never ends up going well. And we know that when we align with personal integrity and be what we wish to receive from life that we produce our most powerful and complete results.
The shift is miraculous.
This integrity centred living is so authentic and powerful, the effect it has on a narcissist is as annihilating as shining a bright light onto a vampire. The narcissist as a false self can only operate in the shadows; they can only do what they do when they are using your fear, heartbreak, guilt, and insecurities against you.
When you emerge solid, confident, powerful and unemotionally expressing facts, without any of the previous trauma derailing you emotionally, that is when narcissists come undone.
Here is the fact that you need to know: if a narcissist cannot have the upper hand emotionally and energetically against you, and can no longer emotionally derail you, then they have lost the fight.
Without you acting out of your dishevelment the narcissist becomes painfully aware of their own. This is when it is time for the narcissist to exit the scene, no matter the cost, and take their disordered self into another environment whereby they can extract narcissistic supply and significance again.
Since working to help people become empowered against narcissists, I have been amazed and thrilled to see previously relentless narcissists, submit, capitulate and hand over whatever is necessary to get out of the lives of people who show up powerfully without fear.
Absolutely this happens regularly in this community with property and custody settlements, with the people who work with NARP (Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program).
Narcissists are broken children in adults’ bodies trying to bully and intimidate their way into position; they are no match for someone powerfully embodied in an adult body.
Number #3 – Energetic Detox
This is the underpinning to all of it. The most powerful way to get a narcissist out of your life, and to completely leave you alone, is by detoxing him or her out of every vestige of your inner being.
This is because of the absolute Quantum law – so within, so without.
When this person doesn’t exist for you, for real emotionally, this person will not exist for you.
Can you imagine what it will be like when you don’t even think about this person?
Can you imagine what it would be like if somebody brought their name up and you had zero emotional reaction at all and the topic is something you don’t even care about?
Can you imagine bumping into this person and you feel nothing at all and by the time you have crossed the road, your mind is thinking about all the things that you need to get done today?
I can assure you, no matter how enmeshed you feel in the thoughts of the narcissist, and even if this has been going on for years or even decades, that 100% when you do the inner work to detox yourself from a narcissist, you will go completely free.
People ask me in disbelief all the time, ‘How can you not think about the ex-narcissists in your life?’ My answer is this, “I did the inner work. I loaded up, released and replaced every single thing about those people that hurt me, or that I was obsessing about. That’s how. Then nothing about them existed anymore.”
You may think that this is not possible until you start doing this work and discover just how possible it is.
Yet, regardless of the situation, when you detox this person out of your inner being, you will discover how this person will dissolve out of your experience.
The narcissist detaches, moves away, gets another job, is brought to justice, and stops harassing whilst co-parenting. You name it, it is possible. Life has unlimited ways to start matching your inner being.
So I hope that this Thriver TV episode has explained to you the three most powerful ways that you will get a narcissist to leave you alone.
Less is more – less combating the narcissist and more doing the feeling and empowering work on yourself.
Do you understand?
If you do, write below, “You get less of me, and my inner being gets more!”
Are you ready to be done with this and get a narcissist out of your life? If so, come with me on your incredible journey of self, by clicking this link.
And, if you want more of my episodes please make sure that you subscribe to my YouTube channel so you will be notified as soon as each new one is released.
Please also share this information with your communities, especially those people who are deeply enmeshed and stuck in the trauma with narcissists who won’t leave them alone.
As always, I look forward to connecting with you in your comments and questions below.
Oh and … It’s the first event of my Oz tour tomorrow … Sydney I can’t wait to see you all – I’m so excited! There is still time for tickets for Melbourne and Brisbane – to which you can get your tickets here: melanietoniaevans.com/oztour